170309

Im really upset..
I still can't face you already left me be with the others
I really can't hold myself to keep thinking of you
Because im still very love you
I keep thinking of you 24hour
Really can't stop myself from thinking of you
But i know how i miss you
But i know how i care you
But i know how i love you
Also you will never respond
You won't feel anything at all
You will just say don't know
You will just say don't ask you
You will just say let god decide
You will just say let it be natural
You know each time you be like this also i feel so hurt and suffer?
Why i can't be the one i love
While the one i don't like keep come to me
Somemore you ask why i don't accept
You know your word really hurt me
While you know i just love you one for my entire life
Why you still ask me to get others?
You think i will be happy with other
You think i will forget all the thing after with other
You are wrong
You are totally wrong
You still not yet understand how i feel
You still not yet understand who im
I already told you im a loyal person
Hard for me to love and trust someone
But once i love and trust
I will be loyal
And will never change
Do you understand
Do you know the word loyal?
I really trust you will be loyal to me forever
But the fact show me totally make me down
Im so hurt for all the thing
You know you really hurt me so deep?
But i forgive and forget
Because i know i love you
If i blame you
I will feel more suffer and you will never feel better
Do you understand all these?
Im now really don't want to think much
I try to use my study to numb myself
I try to drink lot everyday to numb myself
I wish i can get drunk and never wake up to face you and the fact anymore
Until now my heart still bleeding
Until now my heart still so painful

God...
Please take me away from the world
Since you don't give me any chance to be with vincy anymore
Please take me away
I don't want to be so suffer here alone anymore

Do you know how i feel?

Im so damn upset
I feel so suffer and suffer
I really so envy your ex...
Even at last still break with you
But at least you both can last longer than our
I thought we can be togather forever
Because the time we be togather really sweet
Because you also very love and care me
But how come our love just can last 11month
But how come you can just drop our love like that
But how come you can be with him
But how come you can love two in one time
I really not understand
Why you can be loyal to your ex
Why you can't be fair and loyal to me
Im now totally so disappointed
I really don't know what else i still can do for you anymore
I always so love and care you
Even you ask to break and with him also i still love and care you
My feeling on you never change
I know im bad temper
But everyone also got its weakness
You ask me not to expect everyone is perfect
But don't you feel you are also expect me as 100%?
Im just an ordinary guy who got my own feeling and trouble
I also need people to care me
Even you treat me cold
Even you ignore me
Even you scold me
Do i angry
Do i blame you
Because i know you got your own problem
So i choose to forget and forgive
You had hurt me many time also i never angry
I know i will scold you
But only you will realise
You think i not hurt to scold you?
If i don't care you
Why must i waste energy to talk so much
Why must i be so angry
Why must i be so fierce
Even i like control you a lot
But at least you are ok there
At least you don't have gastric
Now after you with him
You get gastric
You think just you pain and suffer
You are totally wrong
Im also pain and suffer due to your problem
If i don't care you
Why i will feel so
Why you can't feel our good while you keep look for our bad
Why you keep blame on people bad while you also never think about your own problem and attitude
Do you know i will never scold people for no reason
Sure you had did something wrong only i will scold
Maybe is your action
Maybe is your attitude
Maybe is your word
Maybe is your way to treat people
You will blame me for ignore you
You will blame me for left you alone
You will angry me for all small thing
But when you ignore me
But when you left me alone
Do you know how i will feel?
Do i angry and ignore you?
You don't like to stay alone
You don't like to be lonely
I also the same with you
I also don't like to be alone
I also don't like to be lonely
But i know you are busy and tired
So i just wait here quietly
Even you are not busy but watch TV
I also forgive
I let you to relax
But why you must angry me when im busy
I know i promise to have more time with you
I really work hard to arrange my work and time
But sometime i really can't finish
I need more time to rush my thing
That why i left you alone
But nomatter how also i will sms let you know
But you still can't forgive me
Even i call you but i don't you are nap
You scold me for disturbing you
But also because im worry you
You always keep quiet whole day
Each time must wait until night time only will find me
Do you know how i feel?
When you wake me up from sleep or nap
Do i angry or scold you?
But i wish to know what wrong with you
I wish to care you more
I wish to accompany you
Sometime you sms me in midnight
Nomatter how tired im also will wakeup and accompany you until you sleep
Even im in sick and rest also i wakeup to accompany you
Do you know how care im to you?
But you still will say i don't care about your feeling
Do you think do you care about my feeling as well?
I keep be patient with your attitude
Because i know you don't mean for what you did
I know you do so sure got your own problem
Even you don't let me know
But i will still know from the way you act and say
I prefer you scold me also i don't want you keep in your heart
I know after you scold you will feel better
I just wish you be happy there
So how hurt im also ok
Because im guy
Got responsibility to make you be happy
Got responsibility to care you more
Because im the one who can you count on
Because im the one who can let you depend
I don't care to get tired to care you
I just care i can't care you more
I just care i can't take care you more
I just care i can't protect you
I really work hard to maintain our relationship
I know is very hard to maintain since is long distance relationship
I know you will be very suffer and lonely over there
I understand how your feel
Because im also same with you over here
Somemore family not by myside
I even feel more suffer here
I prefer to stay at home instead follow my friend out
Because i don't want make you worry
Because i don't want to know any other girls
I don't let myself any chance to make myself change
I just wish to be loyal to you forever
Because i love you
Because i know you been hurt before
Because i know how the feel
I experience before
I been cheated and betray by my ex as well
I know how pain and hurt
So i promise not to let you be hurt
So i must care and love you more
I have lot responsibility on you when you choose to be my babe
Because i don't want make you feel regret
Because i don't want make you feel you choose the wrong guy
I really hope im your Mr Right forever

To you vincy

Im sorry because i break my promise and drink a lot
Sorry vincy

16March

160308
Is the most happy day i ever have in my life
You know why?
Because today you agreed to be my babe
Because today you agreed to be my beloved
But due to my own problem
But due to my own problem
Make me lose chance to keep be with you anymore
But i still very love and care you no matter what going to happen to us
160309
Is the worst day i ever have in my life
You know why?
Because today we already breakup
Because i can't celebrate our 1st year anniversary togather
Because i can't have chance to love and care you anymore
Im so sorry to you due to what had happen to us
Im so sorry because im so useless because i can't even manage and hold a relationship that i care the most
Im so sorry because im so useless because i can't even manage and hold a relationship that i love the most
Im so sorry because im so useless because i can't even manage and hold a relationship that i treassure the most
I really still very love you no matter how
Now i really so disappointed after what we talk yesterday
You told me he treat you not bad
You told me he never rise his voice on you
You told me you already love him as much as you love me before
Im now totally no more dream for me to move forward
Im now totally disappoited with my life
Im now totally disappoited with my love
Im now don't want easy to trust anybody more else
Im now don't want easy to trust any love more else
Because for me you are everything
You forever important in my heart
You forever my babe in my heart
Nobody else will ever ever have chance to replace your position
Never Never Never
My love and care to you i will forever in my heart
My love and care to you i will forever in my mind
This is because i do really love and care you
I won't love and care any others for rest of my life

Im now so desperate
Im now so upset
Im now so down
Im now so hurt
Im now so sad
Im now so disappointed
Im now choose to drunk myself
I never get drunk before
But today i drink a lot of beer untill drunk
I really don't wish to think much anymore
Because the more i think you
The more i will be hurt
Because the more i love you
You will never know
Because the more i care you
You will never feel
Not for any reason
Because you already give up me
Because you already put me down
Because you already don't care our love anymore
Because you already don't love me anymore
Because you already don't care me anymore

Today is our 1st year anniversay
I keep stick to my plan to give you present
Because i already think to give you this right after your birthday
Because i wish to make you happy there
Because it is a meaningful present even just a normal thing
I choose to give you a bear to your office
I named it as Ahlui
Because i gave you one Ahzai before
You know why i choose to name Ahzai and Ahlui
You know why i want to give you Ahlui
Because Ahzai+Ahlui=GOOD
女+子=好
I hope our relationship forever ever good
I hope our relationship forever ever sweet
I really wish to be with you forever ever
The another reason i named them as Ahzai and Ahlui
Because i wish to have a complete family with you
Because i wish to have a son and daughter with you
You know i don't like to have kid
But you had change my mind
I really wish to have two kids with you after we marry
I know you love kids also
Just don't want to have more
So i change myself
Try to have more time with baby
Try to have more time with kid
I feel so relax and happy with them

Im happy because you like Ahlui
Im happy because you appreciate it
But im sorry
Because i know you mother sure will nag and scold you for the present again
Hope Ahzai and Ahlui can accompany mummy more
Hope Ahzai and Ahlui can care mummy more
Hope Ahzai and Ahlui can love mummy more
Because they know daddy already not with mummy
Because they know they are assign by daddy to keep be good to mummy
Because they know daddy still very love and care mummy
Because they know daddy still wish to be with mummy again
Not just for short while but is forever ever
Just let our children to be with you forever ever
I will be ok to be single and alone here
Im really ok...
Even how i feel also no need you worry
You just promise me to be good there
You just promise me to take care there
All of that already more than enough
I really will be fine even my heart always be with you

You message me when your break time
Im have class that moment
Im so upset that moment
I really wish to scream
But i know i must control my emotion
Nomatter how suffer and sad also i must control
Nomatter how suffer and sad also i can't drop any single of my tears anymore
Because i already promise you before
But im still message you back in normal
I just wish to pretend stong and brave
I really don't want to suffer you anymore
I really don't want to hurt you anymore
I really don't want you so worry me anymore
I really don't want you so care me anymore
No need to thanks me
Because all is is my suprise to you
Because i just want you to be happy

I feel it is so meaningless for me give you Ahlui
But you say it is still meaningful for you because you take it as our 1st year anniversary present
Not your wrong to give up our love so easy
Because i really not a good guy
Never treat you good
Never care your feeling
Even im love and care you
But i don't know how to maintain our love
Im just a useless and lousy guy
I never blame you for everything
I really don't angry and blame you
You know i will never do so to you nomatter what you do to me
Not your fault to change your heart to love him
I know all is my wrong because i don't treat you as good as he did to you
Somemore is i who encourage you to go out more with your friends
Because i know you are so lonely there to be alone
Because i know i can't keep accompany you when you need me
So i ask you to go out when you want
I never control you go out or know any new friend
Because it is your freedom to do anything you want
Even after i marry with you also i have no right to control you
But i let you control me anything as you like
Because i just want to make you be secure when be with me
Even i will break some of my promise
But i keep remind myself to bare to my promise and responsibilty
Because i love you the most
Because i care you the most
But now already too late for everything
Bacause now our love already end
Because now i already being replace by him
I wish you both ok there
I wish he really serious to you
I wish he know how to care you more
I wish he know how to love you more
I wish he know how to take care you
I really scared you being hurt or sick
Because i will pain more than anyone
Because i will worry than anyone

I just want you know my heart forever belong to yours
I just want you know that i love you forever
I just want you know that i care you forever

Is end of the story
I can't keep continue for anything more
Because i know i already have no more chance
Because i know how i love and care you also will never change the fact

I now really need to rest
Im now really feel so tired
Somemore im so dizzy now after drunk
I never drunk before
This is 1st time i drunk
Maybe im too upset and sad
Nomatter how dizzy im also i must finish the blog by now
I will put you down
But doen't mean i don't love and care you anymore
But doesn't mean i forget you
I will remember you forever
I will love you and care you forever ever
Just i really need time to recover and calm myself down
And i will never have any other more girls in my life
I prefer to be single if i can't get you back
It is worth for meto do all of this
Because you are so important
I will never regret on what decision i had make
I really feel you are worth for me to do anything
Even you want me to die also i can make it for you
Maybe im crazy and stupid
But is worth for me to do all this to someone i love the most

The last but not the least
Kelvin love vincy forever ever
How also will never change

True love

True love doesn't end...
Hope...Wish... Will...
Be together forever...
Ok?
Love you so much Vincy
Let us create a better future togather
I promise i will be my best to love and care you more
I do serious with you for my entire life
Only you in my heart
Only you in my life
Only you in my world
I will stick with you all the time
Mentally glue we have sure can bring us back togather again

Happy?Sad?Confuse?

Im happy because you at least feel im better than he did
At least you feel i treat you better than he did
At least you feel i care you more than he did
At least you feel i love you more than he did
At least you feel i had improve lot now
I really can accompany when ever you want me
I will be standby just for you anytime

Not because you choose to be with him
Then only i tell you that i don't like him
But the way he treat you not should a boyfriend have
But you still wish to lie yourself that he just not yet get used to be have girlfriend
But for me that is just a lame excuse
He like that just like not really love you
He like that just like not really care you
He like that just like not really serious with you
He make me feel like he is just play with you
You know i really so scared he will hurt you then
Because you both just togather short moment
But already he go to cyber cafe with his friend and just left you aside
Don't you feel he really over for his action?
Now is the most sweet moment for a couple
Why he can do like that to you?
Why he treat you good when want to tackle you from me?
After have you just put you aside
Don't you feel anything wrong?
If he do care you
He will never do so
If he love you
He will never do so
I not understand how can a guy do so to his girlfriend
Somemore is such a caring and lovely girlfriend
I know even myself also don't really treat you good
At least i will never ignore you
At least i will never left you alone
At least i will have more time with you
At least i will love you more
At least i will care you more
At least i understand how your feel
At least i can sacrifice myself to joy you up
At least i can sacrifice my own play time for you
What i know is you really scared to be alone
I know you will so suffer and sad and lonely when there is nobody by yourside
I know all because not just you told me
But i can feel it from you
I really wish to protect you
I really don't want you to get any hurt

16march is our 1st year anniversary
I really wish to have it with you
I don't know what still i can do now
Do the present still meaningful?

You now will find me when you are lonely
Wish to talk with me
But im just your close friend
That all...
But you say you accept him but not fully take him as your boyfriend
Then what you want me do
I also human being
I also got feeling
I really suffer now
But i don't blame you at all
You say sorry to me because drop our 1 year love
You say sorry to me because you break your promise that will never left me so easy
But is really ok...
I really ok...
I don't blame you
So please don't say sorry to me anymore
You say why i don't want to angry or blame you
There is no reason why i must do so
Somemore i so love you
You think i will do that to you?
I prefer to be suffer my own
Also i want you be happy
Also i don't want to hurt you
Do you know i care you more than anyone?
Do you know i love you more than anyone?

You say not happy to be alone there
Hope after talk with me you will feel much better
I know im those who don't know how to talk
I know im those who don't know how to say sweet word
I know im those who don't know how to pujuk you
But i know i love and care you
I wish i can show my love and care to you by action
But not from my word
Because it can be a fake
Because it can be a lie

You say you miss me and think to come to find me
You say you wish to see me
Why?
Still have what meaning for you?
Somemore what for to waste money to come just for a special friend?
I really confuse

You say i still have chance to be with you
But just 50:50
If the guy treat you good
Or you found any other good guy
Mean i have no more chance
You understand how my feel?
You know how the feel to love someone which will never get the love at all
Im experience it now
Really suffer and pain

You know how i miss you?
You know how often i think about you?
You know how important of you in my life?
You know how important of you in my heart?
You know how important of you in my world?

You know now you got gastric
Please remember what i told you to do
I don't want you to suffer as what i did

You know you will be very pain each time period come
Please remember what i told you to do
All i teach you will help you to reduce pain
I really don't want you be so suffer there
Because not just you pain
My heart will even more painful than you have
Because i care you
Because i love you
Because i love you
Because you are my treassure
Because you are my babe
Because i can sacrifice everyhing i have exept you
Because you are vincy
Because kelvin love you

You already have more matured
You already have more good in temper
You already have know how to speak out some of your feeling

Because we will never know how your feel if you never speak out
Because we will never understand how your feel if you never speak out
Because we will never know how to care you if you never speak out
Because we will never know how to protect you if you never speak out
Do you know we all really very care and worry about you?
Especially your mother
She do really care you
She do really want to protect you
That why we will control you
That why we will scold you
That why we will nag you
That why we will remind you
Hope you really can understand what we did really just for your own good

也许爱情是一部忧伤的童话

也许爱情是一部忧伤的童话

♂放弃一個很爱你的人，並不痛苦♀
♂放弃一個你很爱的人，那才痛苦♀
♂爱上一個不爱你的人，那是更痛苦♀

♀逃避，不一定躲得过♂
♂面对，不一定最难过♀
♀孤单，不一定不快乐♂
♂得到，不一定能长久♀
♀失去，不一定不再拥有♂

爱是一种是思念
无论何时何地，当看不到他/她的时候会想念他/她

爱也会是一种担心
当他/她出事的时候，你会比谁都着急

爱是一种包容
你会包容他/她所有的缺点，在你眼里他/她永远是最完美的

爱更是一种回忆
当你想起他/她做出可爱，浪漫的事时，会不知觉的傻笑

觉得好甜蜜，好甜蜜
你体会到了吗，如果沒有就放弃，重新开始吧，祝福你

Im so tired

Im so tired...
After finish my exam just now
I really almost faint down...
I also don't know the reason at all
Feel so headache and gastric right now
Damn dizzy
But i still can't have a proper sleep
I keep night mare all the time
Still have 1 more paper
But don't know when is it will coming to me
Im not yet ready for it
Really scared....
I keep miss you whole day
Keep think back what we talk about yesterday night
You know how worry im now...
You know how pain im now...

If you think you can,you can

If you think you can,you can
I think i want to win your heart again
I sure must work more hard to make it
I sure will wait you here patiently
I sure will love you all the time
Miss you all the time babe
Take care there

Always standby for you Vincy

You forever is my 1st choice in my life
I will always standby here just for you
I will always by yourside when ever you need me
I don't mind to be your 2nd...3rd..4th.....choice
I really don't mind anything anymore
I just wish to let you know that you are the most important person in my life
You are my treassure forever ever
Forever ever 1st place in my life
Forever ever 1st choice in my life
Nomatter how you treat me also i don't mind
Even you no more love and care me also i don't mind
What i mind is i scared i have no more chance or time to love and care you anymore
My heart forever ever just ready for you
Nobody else can have my heart
Nobody else can enter my heart
Nobody else can enter my world
Nobody else can get me away from you
Even there is others standby for me also i will never accept since you more important than anything
Even more important than myself
Because you worth for me to do everything
Because i love you
Because i really really very love you

Realise...

It is a long line that has no turning
Hope springs eternal in the human breast
Never remember the past
Forget the past
Forgive the past
Always walk ahead to your goal

After i read this short sentense
I realise a lot of thing
The long line which has no turning just as like as my relationship
There is no turning for me to be with vincy anymore after breakup
But miracle will happen in next minute
As long as i change myself be a better guy
And prove you my love and care to you
And prove you my loyarity to you
Im sure i will still have chance to win your heart and be togather again
I believe God already arrange the way we must face
I believe our future will be very bright after we had surpass this challenge

No pain no gain
If we never experience the pain after breakup
We will never gain what we wish to have
If we never experience the pain after breakup
We will never know to appreciate someone we do love and care
If we never experience the pain after breakup
We will never know to grow up

I need to forget our past
I need to forgive our past
I need not to remember our past
But i must keep work hard to step forward to our goal
If there is 1000steps for me to succeed to have you for my entire life
As long as i can step forward
Mean i already near to succeed
I believe with my hard work
One day sure can touch your heart
Even the time and energy i need to sacrifice maybe very long
But i feel it is worth to have you for my entire life
Because you always are so special to me
My goal is you
My goal is love and care you with full of my energy
My goal is be with you forever ever

Take care there please

You know i feel so pain after know you are gastric there?
I already ask you to have proper meal and on time
I already ask you not to have so much of spicy and ice thing
But you always say you won't get gastric
Now you see
You suffer now
How..?
You know im so worry and worry you there?
I don't want you become me like this
I know you don't like to drink milk
I won't force you one
But try to have more nestum and try to eat thing on time
Don't get hungry there
If can't eat on time please remember to have something to eat before daily meal
Even just few pieces of biscuit also better than empty you stomach
I really can't take care you much long time
How if im not with you but you are suffer there?
Now i still can worry and care and love you
Now i still can remind you to take care there
But please remember ok
What i always keep remind you also for you own good one
Understand?
Not get used to dating not a excuse
If he really care you
Sure he will have more time with you
Sure he will sacrifice play time with friend
Nomatter how tired or busy also must put you at 1st place
Can't have this kind of excuse to left you alone
I promise to accompany you when you need me
But also i will feel upset because you like not so important to him
I really scared you will get hurt by him later
I really scared
I really worry
I don't want because of me make you get suffer and hurt again
Because i already promise you that i will care and protect and love you forever
This is the one i will never forget and break my promise
I also promise will never ever let you go so easy when you ask to break
I promise i will try my best to care and love you more than him
Im so happy because you feel i had change lot for my temper
But i know everything already too late
You say i always is Ahzai daddy and you are Ahzai mummy
But mummy not belong to daddy
Because is daddy fault
Make mummy hurt and sad
Is daddy fault for break a lovely family
Is daddy fault because can't have Ahlui with mummy
Im so sorry and regret
I ask do he already be your dream prince?
But you say not yet
Im your dream prince before
I really hope i still can continue be your dream prince forever
I hope i won't wait very long time only can be with you again
But im so sad after you tell you never ask me to wait
You know i never mind for anything
You know i only have you in my heart
You know i only have you in my world
You know i only have you in my life
What also i wish to have with you
The time we have not just so short
The time we have must forever ever
I really will keep waiting for you
I really will keep my heart empty just for you
Because kelvin only love vincy in this world
Because kelvin only love vincy for my entire life
Nomatter what also will never change my mind to you
Nomatter what also will never change my love to you
Nomatter what also im yours forever ever
What ever time you need me also i will by yourside
8pm-11pm forever belong to you
Is my practise to have the time with you
I will always on my phone loud when im sleep
Because i can get back to you when you find me
Is my practise to accompany you more

Blur...

I really feel so blur and confuse now
I really don't know what i can do for you more
I really wish you can feel my love and care more
I really wish you can feel i now got more love and care you more
After i lose you than only i know a lot of thing
Include my feeling on you
I know i really love and care you
But after we break
I feel i really impossible to let you go from my life at all
I really so deep in love with you
I know nobody can ever ever give me this kind of feeling
You are the only one who can give me this kind of feeling
You are the one who bring me lot of happiness
You are the one who bring me lot of xingfu
Really
You really very meaningful and important to me
I know i really can't let you go from my life
Even i know the way i act now will make you feel suffer
But i really wish to fight your heart back
I really don't want to be regret later
I really don't want to be alone here anymore
I just wish to have you for my entire life
Even maybe i can't promise you forever ever
But the time i have also i want to be with you only
I want to give you happy and xingfu when i still have chance

I really miss you

I really very miss you there
Is true...
I really very miss you vincy
Im not miss you as a friend
But im miss you as my beloved
I don't know do you still miss me or not
I know if you really miss me also miss as a friend
But i really you can tell me that you are still love and miss me before me that
I really wish to hear
I really hope im still your prince
I really hope im still your beloved
Please let me know everything
Please let me know how your feeling on me now
Please..
I really wish to know all before the end
I really very very love you vincy
You know i really mean it
I really love and care you
I only love and care you
I never been so love and care to anybody before
You are the 1st and also the last
I really happy to be with you
But im so sad and regret after we breakup
You are my only regret in the world
I really wish i can be with you forever
I really wish you can accept me back again
I already change a lot from the days you say to me
I really wish you can accept me back
I know im very crazy and stupid last time
I know i don't know how to appreciate and care people around me
But im now really regret and learn from the mistake
I now really know how to care and appreciate people
I will never treat you like last time anymore
I will never let you cry or hurt anymore
I will never let you regret to accept me back
I really mean it
Im really serious
I swear
If i break my promise
Just let god take me away from the world forever ever
I promise i will listen what ever you say to me
I will always obey what your say

Why...

Why...
What purpose God give me all this challenge?
Want me to appreciate life and people?
But i know God want me to learn to care and love people beside me more
I know...
So i will love and care vincy with full of my heart with the time i have
So i will never regret in future
Even you not love and care me anymore
But i still love and care you forever ever
Im sure i will love and care you forever ever
Nomatter what had happen to us also i will never change my heart
Because i will never meet another true love in my life anymore
This is because you are so important to me
This is because i can sacrifice anything for you
This is because i wish to protect you forever ever
I really don't wish you get any hurt
I will protect you by yourside all the time
I will try my best not to let anything or anyone hurt you
Because you hurt i more hurt
Because you sad i more sad
Because you pain i more pain
Because you are my everything
Because you are more important than myself
Because you are more important than my life

Please take me away

God..
Please take me away
I really tired to work hard for everything
Even the only thing im regret for is vincy
Wish to have you back to me
But i really don't know do you still will give me another chance
But also i can't hold on anymore
Even you are my dream
Even you are my life
But i still don't know why i still think to give up
I really so suffer to be here
Somemore i just can be alone here
Somemore i have no more chance to be with you anymore
Even you say you got feel my love and care to you
But i know you don't have the same feeling on me
So you will never accept me back anymore
I know now you worry and care me also just because im your friend
I don't want to get your sympathy only
I want to have your love and care as babe not just friend
What happen to me now not because you
Just because i can't accept the shock
So you no need to sympathy me at all
Nothing else

Worry+ing you

I really worry you there
I really worry you get hurt there
I really worry
I really scared
I hope i can do more thing for you
I know i don't do much thing to you before
I know i don't care you enough before
I just hope i now can care and love you more
I just hope i now can accompany you more
I just hope i can cheer you up
I just hope i can pay you back

Scared

Just now study until very dizzy
So i fall asleep just like that
I don't know is because study or that?
What happen also i don't know
But just now suddenly think about you vincy
Very miss you until i woke up
And very scared
Because i thought i been unconsious long time
Because i scared i left you alone there
I really scared
Because i already promise you that i will never left you alone
How can i unconsious until you are lonely
I know this is not a excuse to left you alone
I know im bad so i can't repeated this mistake anymore
Sorry vincy

爱

爱

如果爱有原因,那就不爱了;如果爱有目的,那也就不爱了;如果爱可以解释,如果爱合乎情理,那么爱也就不存在了.
爱情不合乎逻辑___或许,这就是爱情的逻辑. 你真正热爱的,或许并不是一个大家公认的最该爱,最值得爱,爱得最正确的人,而只是一个使你忘乎所以,无法不爱.
　　
爱情不合乎逻辑___或许,这就是爱情的逻辑.
你真正热爱的,或许并不是一个大家公认的最该爱,最值得爱,爱得最正确的人,而只是一个使你忘乎所以,无法不爱的人.
爱不是因为被爱,不是为了被爱,而只是因为爱.你不会因为没有被爱而失去爱,爱在爱的人心里,而不在被爱人的眼中.
爱情没有模式.不同的人,为你做同一件事,你会感到天壤之别.因为我们在意的,往往不是人做的事,而是做事的人.
爱在心里,不在口中.绝口不提爱你,不是不爱,而是因为太爱.太爱,所以怕伤害,太爱,所以甘愿受害;太爱,所以容易错过爱.
爱是盲目的.热爱之中,我们会无视对方的缺点,优点便是优点,缺点也成为优点.而放弃时,一切全变了,错了就是错了,对了也是错了.
爱情不会被泪水俘获,可以俘获的是感动与怜悯.
嫉妒并非爱情专一的体现.爱情的基础是相互信任,嫉妒则意味着猜疑与不满.
爱情从不讲究公平,讲得出公平的,不是爱情.你可以甘愿为别人付出一切,却不能要求别人为你奉献任何;你可以不愿抛弃别人,可当你被抛弃时,却不能责怪爱情的无情.
爱情不是强加,不是占有,爱情其实很温柔.如果你要得到他,那么就让他自由;
走得最急的,都是最美丽的风景.伤得最深的,也总是那些最真的感情.
当你想要拼命宣泄刻GU恨的时候,最无力隐藏的,该是同一份铭心的爱.
纠缠与吵闹并不能使爱情维系持久.有时候,执着_体现于无言的忍耐与默默地承受,貌似不爱,却更能使爱得以解脱,得以不朽.
"不强求天长地久,只在乎曾经拥有",其实这只是对天长地久的绝望.
爱情是爱与爱的沟通,情与情的呼应,它无须形影相随,却要求心心相印.
爱可以包容怨,可以接纳恨,爱情不需要说抱歉.同行一生,是难能的缘分,共度一旅,也是一份可贵的纪念!!
爱情没有因果,爱情没有规则,爱情不分对错,爱情永不褪色.
爱情充满逻辑__或许!这就是爱情的逻辑.在所有的雨中,淋湿我的那一滴,才是真的雨!

Arghhh...

Today i not so convenient to move much
My leg is very pain
Twist my leg after playing basketball yesterday
Haiz..
So pain ah
I already massage it but like still no different
How much more pain killer i still need to eat?
I already eat a lot of it
I know i shoudn't eat so much but really pain until i can't hold on anymore
Really miss the time you help me massage my head when im headache
But now i have no chance to enjoy anymore
Nose bleeding all the time
Already enough ya
Make me very suffer
Face so hot
Head so pain
Blood keep come out
Arghh...
I want to give up ah...

Suffering now

Suffering now
Is this because it become more worst?
I really so suffer
I really can't hold on anymore
But i really miss and love you vincy
I still wish to have you again in my life
You are my motivation to keep move on
You are my light in the dark
Lead me to a better way
Tiring now
Is this because i need face exam again?
I really tired
I really need more time to rest and calm down
You navigate me to our future
Navigate me to better future

If i have to choose

If i have to choose between loving you and breathing
I would use my last breathe to say I LOVE YOU,Vincy
I would use my last breathe to say I LOVE YOU FOREVER EVER
Hope i can care and love you with all of my time i have

Hope you understand me

Sorry because disturb you sleep
I really not sure do he treat you good?
If he really don't treat you good
Please let me know
Do you know im still very love you?
Do you know im still very care you?
Do you know im still very worry you?
Do you know im still wish to protect you?
Do you know i really scared you will get hurt?

I really hope you understand all
Even if he treat you good also i wish to be with you again
Because i already promise to myself and god
If im given another chance
Sure i will treat you better than last time
Because you forever is my babe in my life in my heart
Im really serious for that
Even now im sick but also i wish to be with you
Even im now more and more serious also i wish to be with you
Because you are my only regret
Because you are the only treassure i want to have for my entire life
Nothing is valuable than you
You are priceless in my heart
You are my princess
I wish im still your prince
I will do whatever you ask me to do
Im still waiting for you babe vincy
I love you

Love will never fade

I can pretent in whatever thing i need to face
I will do my best to settle all of my thing secretly
I will never let people around me to worry
Expecially you vincy
I don't know what your feeling after know this
But i really wish you can be calm
I don't want you to be sad or hurt
Because i love and care you

I never pretend the feeling to you
For me im very sure that i love and care you
There is no reason for why i so love you
Even myself also can't give any explaination
I just know i love you vincy forever ever
This is the love i will never have with others besides you
The love i have to you will never fade no matter how long times had gone

What is Love and Like..

Like-maybe just because everything he had did to you
Love-will never think or mind whatever you had did for him

Like-maybe just because his personality is good
Love-will never mind even his personality is very bad

Like-will advice him not to go out when rainning
Love-will willing to accompany him when rainning

Like-maybe just because of his good thing
Love-will willing to accept all of his bad thing

Like-maybe because he willing to be your listener
Love-will accept what ever blamming on you from him

Like-maybe need 1000 of reasons
Love-no need any reason at all

Like=a little bit love
Love= deep deep like

My answer is love
I love vincy forever
Not because of anything
Just because is you vincy

My heart will always be with you

I not sure don you now still very happy and xingfu?
But i feel you not so happy now
Because he like not so care about you at all
Always left you alone
I know you don't like this kind of feeling
same as me here
I also don't like to being left alone
We both also love people to care and love
I just want you know no matter what had happen
My heart will always be with you
No matter what happen also will never change my heart to you
I also don't know why im so crazy with you
There is no other reason except i really love you
I know i maybe not so serious in relationship before with you
But you enlighten my life my dream my world
At that moment im sure that you are my forever beloved
At that moment im sure that you are my true love
At that moment im sure that you are my everything
Nobody is perfect in this world
But for me you are totally perfect
I never have this feeling before
You are the only one who bring me to colourful world
You are the my only one
When i 1st know you
Im sure that you are Mrs Right
Im sure that i will only want you for rest of my life
I love you since Jan 2008
Until now im still i love you
That why i can wait you last time
That why i can wait you now
I don't care to wait how long
But for me you are worth for me to sacrifice all of my thing
No matter how also i will never regret
Because i know if i can't fight more to have you again sure i will regret for my entire life
Even if one day i really put you down
Doesn't mean i don't love you anymore
But i feel you already get someone who really good to you and can promise your future
So how suffer or hurt also i must let you go
And wish for your luck
And wish for your happiness
And i will secrectly hide aside to look after you
And i will never look for other babe in my life
Even if i really have other babe in my life
For sure there is nobody will as important as you
For sure there is nobody can replace your position in my heart

I know now i maybe can't give you more promise due to certain reason
But i will still use full of my time to love and care you
Because you are vincy
Because you are my true love and beloved
This is my faith to you
This is my faith to care and love someone in my life
Even maybe there is no result in the end but also is my faith to sacrifice myself
Im loyal and honest to you all the time
I also very stuborn to wait for something impossible
But for me there is nothing is impossible
But this is one of my characteristic
How also i will never regret because the one im waiting to is you vincy

I just want you know even there is many unhappy thing happen to you
I also will be here to be your listener
I will try my best to advice you
I will try my best to care you
I will try my best to cheer you up
Even there is many thing happen
Also i will do my best to help you settle
I don't care how many time,money and energy to help you
But also i will never complaint
But also i will never feel tired
But also i will never feel stress
But also i will never regret
Because i love you

Nomatter how also im still waiting for you
I welcome you back to myside again anytime you like
I welcome you back to myside again when you feel not happy outside
I welcome you back to myside again when you had play enough
Nomatter what reason also i welcome
I don't care if you not so love and care me as old time
But i know im still love and care you as last time
But i promise i will do more perfect than last time
So i will be good to care and protect you
I really wish i can make you be happy for your entire life

I will be with you all the time

I know i should't tell you the truth
The truth always very cruel
I don't wish to tell you because i really care and love you
I scared i will hurt you again
I scared i will make you sad again
I really don't want to be like this
But everything already too late
So please don't ever ever tell anyone
And can't be sad
Please don't cry for me anymore
I know you are so lonely and boring at night
I can accompany you one
Don't worry
Because my heart always be with you
I wish i still can care and love you more
Please let me know when you are sad or moody
Ok?
I will be with you all the time
When you feel not happy or xingfu anymore
I welcome you back
Anytime you want to back also can
If you still don't want me also i will wait
I just i still can be with you while i still have time
Take care there
Love and miss you forever ever

Tired to pretend

Im tired to pretend
I really tired...
Why nobody understand me at all
Why you all never care about my feeling at all
I don't care if you are don't care me
But please don't scold me like hell all the time

I really don't know how long i can last

Thanks Joenl,Teena,Stephanie,Meimei
I know you all keep advice me to be brave and strong
Nomatter how also must keep continue with my thing
I understand but im now really tired,suffer and disappointed
I really lose my courage to keep it on
But also i know you all will angry and sad if i do really give up
But even i don't give up but also i don't know how long it can last
I really don't know what else i can do
I really don't know how strong i can be
I really don't know how long i can last

Don't know what to do

Sorry...
Not i really wish to give up
Because im still waiting for someone important
But is very suffer
Somemore i need to face my own
Nobody care and love me now...
The love and care i want from someone but now no more i can get
So really wish to end up all the suffer and pain

I really want to give up

Today i don't know how many time i had faint down because of pain
The pain killer i have already i clear all
Now im so suffer due to my pain
But nothing i can do
I had to hold the pain
Is really suffer
Can it stop?
Please god..
Let it stop ok?
Please don't suffer me anymore
I know is my repay for treating you bad
Sorry
But please stop all the pain and bleeding
I already had enough
I really want to give up
Sorry

Chubby no more...

Just now i look at mirror
Realise i had slim down a lots
So i choose to weight my weight
Now only i know i had lose bout 13kg
Mean im now almost 60kg
No wonder i feel i looks so old and slim
Now my face no more chubby anymore
Now my face no more extra thing to cubit anymore
But nevermind
Because i just will let vincy cubit
No one else can do so
So even im now no more chubby also nevermind
I now realise my eye bag and panda eye
Now more serious
Now my panda eye more obvious
More dark now...
Haiz...
What to do...

Give up....

Im now so suffer
Im now so pain
Im now so sad
Im now so upset
Im now so down
Im now so tired

I really don't want to accept anything more in my life
I really already feel so tired
I really wish to give up everything

For those know about me sure will scold me
And will ask me to be brave
And will ask me to win all the challenge

But i really can't hold on anymore
Not because im weak
But i really tired
All the thing happen too sudden
I really can't accept the reality

I wish to give up
Sorry to all people who care and support me
I also wish to be with you forever
But i really have no more future due to my own problem
Sorry vincy because what i had promise totally can't realise to you anymore
Sorry vincy because im going to left your life
Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...
Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...Sorry...

Im just a normal guy

I just a normal guy who need love and care
I just wish to have a normal life
I just wish to have a simple life
I just wish someone who know me
I just wish someone who can comfort me when im in bad mood and sad
Im too ordinary
Nobody will care my feeling at all
Nobody will notice me at all
I just like nobody to everyone
I just like someone who let you all to shout and scold at

You all know i really very hate myself?
You all know i also have my own temper?
You all know i just a normal guy?
You all know i don't like the way you all treat me?

I just wish to have all of my time with someone i love the most
Why i still cant't have just a simple wish?
Why?why?Why?
I just wish to care and love someone i love
But i know im over control but also because i care about you
Even it is bad but also because i love you
I wish to protect you from time to time
I wish to care you from time to time
I really don't wish to see you cry or hurt

You know i really feel so guilty and xinteng when know you get hurt or sick?
You know i really very lonely and scared when you left me alone whole day?
You know i really very worry when i can't get any news from you?
You know i really scared to being alone?

I know im not a perfect guy
And i never ask you to be perfect
But i really so scared to lose you
But i really so worry about you
You maybe dislike what i do
But i just wish to show you my love and care
I really care n love you the most
Nobody i will going to treat like this
And also i lazy to care and love other people i not care
I just be like this to you because for me you are my world
I just be like this to you because i love you

Pain...

I feel so suffer and pain for my head now
No matter how many pain killer i take in also like got no use at all
I still will feel so suffer
I hate to be like this...
Please help me
I really can't take in anymore
I really can't accept anything comes to me anymore
I just wish i have an ordinary life with the one i love
I don't need ant special thing in my life
Just a simple and normal life already enough
The most value property i want to have just you vincy
I really don't want any other things more
I really can put down everything for you
I can put down my self-respect for you as well
I can sacrifice all of my thing for you
I can sacrifice anything just for you
I don't mind for everthing
I just mind you
I just know i really love you
No more others thing
No more others thing
Only you
Only you
Forever only you

The only regret

The only regret i have in my life just you vincy
The only one
Because i lose you and will never have your care and love anymore
I really so regret
But i know i have no more any chance in future
What i can do more else...
Nothing...
Since i also don't know what will going on to us
Im so sorry to vincy because i can't keep my promise to you anymore
Im sorry to vincy because i can't love and care you anymore
I really really love you vincy
Really nobody else i will going to love
You really so special in my life
You really brighten my life
I really wish to have my life with you
But i really know it is already impossible

Please remember...

不要让爱你的人受到一丝一毫的伤害！不要等到失去了，才痛不欲生

Bye...

I don't know what else i write in my blog anymore
Now i just wish to say thanks for those friends who had help me lot during my miserable moment
And also wish to say sorry to those who get hurt from me
Especially you vincy
I know during this whole year
You had get hurt very deep by me
Sorry
And wish to say bye to everyone
Since we can't predict anything in our future
And also don't know what will going to happen in the next secoond
So i had to say bye bye to my family vincy and all my dear friends
If there anything happen also will not going to regret
Wish you all can be happy all the moment
Wish you all the best
I wonder i can you all angel one day
So you all are under well protection
I really don't wish anyone i know get hurt
And for you vincy
Please take good care of yourself
Don't be so blur and mcc anymore
You also must grow up and be more matured
Wish you can be forever happy
No matter what had happen
You forever is my beloved babe
This is the faith i have you as my babe
This is the faith for me to love you so much
Im really glad for all the thing give by God
Im really glad
Even we can't be togather forever
But you forever stay in my heart
The love to you will never fade
The care to you will never less
Just maybe the way is different
Just maybe from other place to show you
Bye vincy
I love you forever ever
I miss you forever ever

Enough...

Today im so tired and tired
Today i really feel not well at all
But i still insist to go for basketball
But today really so cold
Even i already wear long sleeve and jacket but still so cold
We play almost 3 hours there
Tired now...
Just can lay down on bed doing nothing
Im so worry and fan...
I really don want to have anymore trouble comes to me anymore
I really can't take in any other thing in my mind
My health already very spoil now
Now i already can't do anything
Now i already can't care and love people anymore
Now i already can't bring any happiness to people anymore
Sorry to you all
Sorry to vincy because i maybe can't bring you any other sweet and happy moment anymore
Sorry...
I already have enough
My life is so miserable
I really wish to give up everything
I really don't wish to keep continue with you all
I really tired

Health...

Is enough...
Everything already enough
I really very suffer all the time now
Why you must keep trouble me
Why health must keep trouble me
I hate you
I hate you
Please let all the things come to end
I reallt don't wish to get any suffer anymore
I now already so suffer after all the things happen
So can you please left me anymore?
Don't keep come to me again and again...

Why must make me so suffer now

Nose bleeding again and again
What wrong to me?
How come keep bleeding
Somemore is not easy to stop it
Somemore each time i bleed also i feel so hot on my body and so headache
What wrong to me?
Please don't scared me
Please don't worry me
Please don't worry those who care me
Please don't suffer anymore
Please don't play me anymore
If really need me to go to end
Why must make me so suffer now

Argh.....

Tired...
Not because of nothing but just i also don't know
Maybe is because i don't have proper rest recently
I really don't know
Im feeling suffer especially in night time
Because already not much thing i can do at that moment
So lonely and lonely
Quiet night is the time i most suffer
Haiz...
Even have no mood to continue study and sleep
What i can do...
What i can do...
I will look back all the photo but i will more upset afterward
But i only can have my memory back by those photo
Since now i already can't have memory in reality anymore

Vincy...Kelvin only love you forever

Can you please don't say sorry to me anymore?
You know i don't like you to say sorry to me
I really don't like
You like this will make me more suffer
You like this will make me more guilty
You know all is my wrong
Why you still want to keep say sorry?
You know no matter how many sorry you say also won't recover my heart?
You know no matter how many sorry you say also won't change the ending we have?
You know no matter how also i never blame or angry you
You know no matter how also i will going to blame and angry myself for everything
So please don't do like this anymore
I now really work hard to be your friend
Because i know now i really have no more any chance anymore
I don't have chance now
I don't think i still will have any chance in future
Since you will still compared me with other
So i will never ever have chance to back into your heart
I will never have chance to marry with you
I will never have chance to have child with you anymore
But if miracle comes one day sure i will appreciate it
Because no matter how long times had gone by
You forever still place no.one in my heart
You forever the only girl i love and care in the world
You know i really mean it
I never lie you anything until now
Since i know you don't being cheated
Since i know you wish your man be loyal just to you
So i will never cheat you
So i will be loyal to you forever

Vincy...Kelvin only love you forever
Vincy...Kelvin will only love you one in my life
No more other who can come into my life

Not just now but is forever
Even you not love me also you can't stop me from love you
Even you not love me also you can't stop me from waiting you

I will be yours forever
I will only belong to you forever

No matter there is a lot other good girls outside also i will never accept
Because for me you are my world
Because for me you are my life
Because for me you are my everything

Because for me you are even important than myself

Upset...

Just now im clean some of my thing on my desk
Include book and my diary
When i put them back into my cupboard
Letter you write to me and your photo drop out
Im so upset when saw all these thing
I think i can put you down
But i know i can't after saw all these thing
Is very happy and sweet to read back your letter
Even just short letter
But i really treassure them
I keep in my diary because you will be always by myside all the moment i goes by
When open my drawer
Saw the love keychain you gave me
This keychain is meaningful if both love each other and mix them togather
Because it is love shape
Without you and your love
Make me feel incomplete
Just like the keychain
It will never become a complete heart and love anymore
Just like my life
Totally incomplete since i can't get any love and care from you anymore
I will never be complete anymore when you not with me
Once i saw all these thing make me almost get cry again
Each time also i hold myself
I don't let any single of my tears drop out
I know im so useless while im still being so sad and suffer here alone
While you already start your new life with him
I know how sad or suffer im now also you will never know
I know how sad or suffer im now also you will never care
But im still very care about you
Really wish to know what are you doing there
How is your life over there
Im so guilty because i can't protect and take care you anymore
While i promise i will protect and take care you forever until my last breath
But now all become like this
I really hate who im
I really hate im kelvin
I really hate myself why i never love and care you more
If i know then we will never end up like this
This semester i still quiet free
Less subject i need to study
Make me have more time to think about myself
Why we must have that much subject last semester
Why we must combine the subject for 1st and 2nd year togather last semester
Is very crazy
Make me really crazy
So busy and tiring life here
No much time to relax
No holiday at all
Just can rest by sunday but still pack with homework
But all already past
If you now still with me
Im sure i will never be that crazy anymore
How do i live my days without you
Please forgive me
I swear i will never be like that anymore

The day you went away

Well I wonder could it be
When I was dreaming 'bout you baby you were dreaming of me
Call me crazy call me blind
To still be suffering is stupid after all of this time

Did I lose my love to someone better
And does she love you like I do
I do you know I really really do

Well hey so much I need to say
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away
So sad but true
For me there's only you
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away

I remember date
09-02-2009
No longer shouting at each other
There were tears on our faces

And we were letting go of something special
Something we'll maybe never have again
I know, I guess I really really know

Well hey so much I need to say
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away
So sad but true
For me there's only you
Been crying since the day
The day you went away

Why do we never know what we've got till it's gone
How could I carry on
The day you went away
Cause I've been missing you so much I had to say
Been crying since the day
The day you went away

Cause you, you light up my life

So many nights, I'd sit by my window,
Waiting for someone to sing me her song.
So many dreams, I kept deep inside me,
Alone in the dark, now you've come along.

And you light up my life,
You give me hope, to carry on.
You light up my days
And fill my nights with song.

Rollin' at sea, adrift on the waters
Could it be finally, I'm turning for home
Finally a chance to say, "Hey, I Love You"
Never again to be all alone.

And you light up my life,
You give me hope, to carry on.
You light up my days
And fill my nights with song.

You, You light up my life
You give me hope to carry on
You light up my days
And fill my nights with song
It can't be wrong, when it feels so right

Cause you, you light up my life

I swear

I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky
And I swear like the shadow that's by your side

I see the questions in your eyes
I know what's weighing on your mind
You can be sure I know my part

Cause I'll stand beside you through the years
You'll only cry those happy tears
And though I make mistakes
I'll never break your heart

I'll give you every thing I can
I'll build your dreams with these two hands
We'll hang some memories on the walls

And when...and when just the two of us are there
You won't have to ask if I still care
Cause as the time turns the page,
My love won't age at all

And I swear...I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky
I'll be there...I'll be there
I swear...and I swear like the shadow that's by your side
I'll be there...I'll be there

For better or worse,
Till death do us part,
I'll love you with every beat of my heart
And I swear

That's why you go away

Baby want you tell me why there is sadness in your eyes
I don't wanna say goodbye to you
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

You're the one who set it up
Now you're the one to make it stop
I'm the one who's feeling lost right now
Now you want me to forget every little thing we have
But there is something left in my head

I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feelings so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

You were never satisfied no matter how I tried
Now you wanna say goodbye to me
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere
Don't know which way to go
There is so much to say now between us
There ain't so much for you
There ain't so much for me anymore

Please forgive me

It still feels like our first night together
Feels like the first kiss and
It's gettin' better baby
No one can better this
I'm still hold on and you're still the one
The first time our eyes met it's the same feelin' I get
Only feels much stronger and I wanna love ya longer
You still turn the fire on

So If you're feelin' lonely.. don't
You're the only one I'd ever want
I only wanna make it good
So if I love ya a little more than I should

Please forgive me I know not what I do
Please forgive me I can't stop lovin' you
Don't deny me

This pain I'm going through
Please forgive me
If I need ya like I do
Please believe me
Every word I say is true
Please forgive me I can't stop loving you
Still feels like our best times are together
Feels like the first touch

We're still gettin' closer baby
Can't get close enough I'm still holdin' on
You're still number one I remember the smell of your skin
I remember everything
I remember all your moves
I remember you
I remember the nights ya know I still do

One thing I'm sure of
Is the way we love each other
And the one thing I depend on
Is for us to stay strong
With every word and every breath I'm prayin'
That's why I'm sayin'...

Right here waiting for you

Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain

If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I thought would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' crazy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' crazy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
Waiting for you

Without you

No I can't forget this day
Or your face as you were leaving
But I guess that's just the way the story goes
You always smile but in your eyes your sorrow shows
Yes it shows

No I can't forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrow
When I had you there but then I let you go
And now it's only fair that I should let you know
What you should know

I can't live
If living is without you
I can't live
I can't give anymore
I can't live
If living is without you
I can't give
I can't give anymore

Well I can't forget this day
Nor your face as you were leaving
But I guess that's just the way the story goes
You always smile but in your eyes your sorrow shows
Yes it shows

I can't live
If living is without you
I can't live
I can't give anymore
I can't live
If living is without you
I can't live
I can't give anymore

No I can't live
No I can't live

I can't live

No I can't live
No I can't live

If living is without you
I can't live without you

How do i live

How do I,
Get through the night without you?
If I had to live without you,
What kind of life would that be?
Oh, I
I need you in my arms, need you to hold,
You're my world, my heart, my soul,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything good in my life,

And tell me now
How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

Without you,
There'd be no sun in my sky,
There would be no love in my life,
There'd be no world left for me.
And I,
Baby I don't know what I would do,
I'd be lost if I lost you,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything real in my life,

And tell me now,
How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

Please tell me baby,
How do I go on?

If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything,
I need you with me,
Baby don't you know that you're everything,
Real in my life?

And tell me now,
How do I live without you,
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

How do I live without you?

How do I live without you baby?

What i can do...

What i can do
What can i do to numb myself?
I now already try to make myself tired and busy
But at the moment i will still feel sad and lonely
What to do
Wha to do...
Anyone can please help me
I really need to put down my feeling down
I now really feel so tired
I already don't know how to love and care people anymore
I really don't dare to say love anymore
I really don't want to ger hurt anymore
I really not brave to love anymore
This time is the time i get most hurt and sad
I never experience this before
Even my ex treat me bad when breakup
But also i not feel so pain and hurt
Because you are my true love
My only love in my life
I already been hurt and hurt many many times
Each time i really put all of my effort into a relationship
Why in the end im still being alone
Why in the end also im the one who get sad and suffer
Why you can put down thing so easy
Why you can totally get lost from my life
Why i can't get lost from your life
Why im still stay alive under your shadow

AQUARIUS-The Sweetheart

AQUARIUS-The Sweetheart

Optimistic and honest.
Sweet personality.
Very independent.
Inventive and intelligent.
Friendly and loyal.
Can seem unemotional.
Can be a bit rebellious.
Very stubborn, but original and unique
Attractive on the inside and out.
Eccentric personality.

Is Time To Say Goodbye?

When I'm alone I dream of the horizon and words fail me.
There is no light in a room where there is no sun
And there is no sun if you're not here with me,not here with me.
From every window unfurls my heart the heart that you have won.
Into me you've poured the light,
The light that you found by the side of the road.

Time to say goodbye.
Places that I've never seen or experienced with you.
Now I wish, I wish with you upon ships across the seas,
Seas that exist no more,
It's time to say goodbye.

Vincy
When you're far away I dream of the horizon and words fail me.
And of course I know that you're no more with me,no more with me.
You, my moon, you are no longer with me.
My sun, you're here had gone from me

Time to say goodbye.
Places that I've never seen or experienced with you.
Now I wish, I wish to sail with you upon ships across the seas,
Seas that exist no more,

Both
I wish to revive them with you.
I wish to go with you upon ships across the seas,
Seas that exist no more,
I wish to revive them with you.
I wish to go with you.

You and me if the chance come

Nothing except tired

Im really tired
I keep make myself tired
I keep make self have not much time and energy to think
So i try to play basketball more
Each time play few hour
After that sure tired
Then i sure can sleep good
But still will get shock for few times
The time i back malaysia is about 68kg
I think i now less than 65kg
What to do...
Been 1 month already also i can't be recover
While im so hurt and sad here
But you are so happy and xingfu there
Is good for you too
Since you not deserve to get hurt and sad

Only you and you

You are the 1st girl i don't wish to give up
I not 1st time breakup
But only you are so special
Only you can make me so loyal and sincere to you
Only you can make me still keep wait and wait for you even you ask to break
I really very love you
You know there is nobody else i will going to accept except you
Im really very serious with our relationship
I really wish to have good ending with you
I really wish to be marry with you and care you until my last breath
You forever also so special and important in my heart
Nobody is as special and important as you
Nobody can replace you
Really nobody
Because i only see you in my heart in my eye and in my mind

Do you will still give me 2nd chance?

Im really so sad and sad
Im really so jealous and envy wheb see you both so sweet and happy
I so hate myself
Why i must realise so late
Why i can't feel all the changes you have since December
If i can realise early
Then we will never be like this
Why the moment i busy study and ignore you whole week
Why i don't take more act to concern you when you totally ignore me
Why im so stupid
Why must i so stupid
Damn to myself
I now really feel no more chance i can have to be with you anymore
I now really feel hopeless to make you accept me back
Haiz....
Do you will still give me 2nd chance?
Do you will still accept me back?
Do you will still let me be your dream prince?
I really don't wish to give up you
I really don't wish to lose you
This few day i calm down myself and had think a lot of thing
Now only i can know all this thing
Why i never calm down myself to think
Think what wrong to us
Think what wrong to myself
Think what i can do for you
Think lot more lot more
I now really work very hard to change
And everything is still working well
All the changes i make is still carry on
I really wish to show you fast
You know the moment i be with you is the happiest moment in my life
You know i really enjoy to be with you
You make my life complete
I feel incomplete again after you left me
You bring me out from sadness
You bring me happiness
You bring me love
You bring me xingfu
You bring me to be more confident and brave
What you had make to me really a lot
Just you never realise

Too late to realise

Just now i read back your blog again
I feel i not just need to learn to change myself
But also i need to learn to understand and care about you feeling
I know i had over control your life
I know you like someone to control you
But at the same time you wish to have some freedom and some privacy
And need someone who care about your feeling
Now i realise
Don't worry
I will change
Before this i really don't know i had control you too much
I always think what im doing is for your own good
But i don't think much beside that
I always so worry and care you until im so nervous when you are going out
I know sometime you are in busy or bad mood
So don't inform me when want to go out
Sorry
I shouldn't scold you for this
Sorry
I really wish you will forgive me and give me another chance again
I will care and understand you more from now on
Sorry because i hurt you that much
I know you feel my love and care
But i also know you don't like the way i use
Im so regret for why i understand all this thing so late
I promise you that i will be more careful when doing anything
I know you love to being pampered but not control
I know you love to being care but not being scold
I know..I really know this time
I wonder i still have 2nd chance to prove you all
I really understand now...
But sometime you also must speak out some of your feeling
So i will know you more
Not because i don't love or care you
Just i already use the wrong way
Or use the bad way to show that to you
Sorry
Would you forgive me and accept me back babe?
I really very loev you
You know i really can't life without you
How you want to test me also i can
I really can
I just don't want to lose you
I just wish to be with you forever
I just wish to marry with you babe
I really wish to havemy entire life just with you
No more other i wish to have after i know you
You know i really mean that
You know im really loyal to you
You know my heart always be with you
No matter how also i never change
Even there is other girls come to me also i don't accept
Even now you choose to break also i still willing to wait
And reject any other girls to me
Believe me ok?
Please believe me once again
Please believe me for last time
I sure i will never let you down anymore
I will make sure you will never regret
I promise to you babe
I swear to god...
If i do repeat the same mistake again
I will be alone until my death
OK??
Please accept me back...
Love and miss you

Forgive and forget

Why i want to say forgive and forget
Both also play an important role in LOVE
When someone do thing wrong
We will listen to the excuse and calm self down
Then we will forgive
Even sometime we think not to forgive someone
But also because of love
Love really can make people lost
Even love is sweet
Even love is happy
But love also make people tired and hurt
So we must learn to forgive
Give each other chance to change
You can't always blame on someone
But at the same time you also must think about yourself
Because problem will never appear by one side
Problem sure come from both
But this is normal for a couple
Because both different individual
Both have different lifestyle
Both have different problem to face
Both have different characteristic
So must must learn to forgive
At the same time also must think the way to solve the problem
Why we must roll the ice cream before serve?
Because we understand the concept
Ice cream will have bigger size from time to time you roll it
So it is also the same to relationship
If you choose to forget after forgive
And never self-reflection
How you think about the problem as time goes by?
Sure it will become big problem when comes to the end
And each time when come to this
Both already feel so tired and no more energy to do anything anymore
Just let it be
So the ending will be breakup
Why can't take out the problem when it is still minor
Discuss it well and think to settle
If really can't solve also will know how to reduce and control
So communication is very important
Instead of quarreling and crying
Why don't take the time to think and self-reflection
Because both also got wrong when there is something wrong
No more blame anyone more
This is children action
We as aldult must be brave for everything
We already no more pampered small kid
But we already grow up
Have own way of thinking
Share to each other
Will make both grow up at the same time
And will make both have more similar
This is correct way to settle thing
Since more similar from attitude and mindset
Then only the relationship become stable
So please remember to think...self-reflection...and discuss
Don't be shy to speak out anything
Don't scare after speak out will hurt others
This is the way to improve
Not others improve but also self improve
Because if you keep hide all the feeling in your heart and mind
Other will never know what are you thinking and feel
Other only can know by guess
But is got a limit for a person to hold on
How good temper also will explode
Just like volcano
It will blow out when it is time
Once it is blow out
Then it is very critical
And will hard to recover
Even recover also will scar
So at the time we learn to forgive
And must learn to forget whatever had happen
Even we maybe can't totally take out the hurt from our mind and heart
But why don't we try our best to make it?
By this not can make self relief but will make other stay happy
So please enjoy the moment to be gather
Is faith bring us to meet
Is faith who bring us to be couple
So please don't because of self problem and destroy the faith arrange by god
Is not easy to have good faith in your life
How often you will going to meet your Mr or Mrs Right?
Once??or Twice??
Mostly just once
After you miss it
How you cry also no more use because he or she will belong to other
Unless you can empty your heart to wait
Wait the day you can touch her heart again
But you will never know how long you will going to wait
Maybe you have to wait until you are old
Only the faith comes to you again
You may meet lot of people who say love you in your life
But how many of them really do love and care you?
How many of them really are serious to be with you forever?
So we must be careful when look for your spounser
Since you are the one who get hurt at last
Please don't get attract by what you see
Have more opinion from other before make any decision
Because you maybe will get lie from their outstanding appearance,sweet word and other else
So please be careful for everything you wish to have
Maybe the one you left now is not perfect
But how if the next one more worst?
Then only you understand you are so lucky before
Wake up everyone
Open your eye wide
Open your ear wide
See more hear more
Don't scared to waste some time
As long you can get someone good then everything already worth

Life....

Is very hard to love someone who doesn't love you
The time to love and wait is really suffer and tiring
But if you feel she or he is worth for you to keep
So you must be brave to stick to your heart
Since you maybe get regret afterward
Because nobody will predict what is going to be happen in the next second
All not on our hand
What on our hand just to work hand and wait patiently
Even now she or he not belong to you
But who will know at the next minute he or she belong to you?
So you must be brave in this moment
Maybe not much people will going to support
Or maybe will tease why you are so stupid to wait something maybe have no result
Then you should ask youself do he or she worth for you to sacrifice your energy your time
If you feel is not worth
Please give up because you will feel very tired along the journey
And what i can say is you don't really love the person
So you not deserve to have he or she
But when you are very sure to yourself that is worth for you to do whatever thing to he or she
Even he or she will never know what you had did
Even he or she will never feel the thing you had did
But at least you will still be ok
As long as you love he or she
L-O-V-E is very incredible and special
When you found you love someone
You will do a lot of thing that you will never do before
Or do those thing you dislike before
Because not just you enjoy the moment with he or she
But also wish he or she be happy
So whenever he or she ask
Please never reject
And accept it
And must try your best to make it perfect
Because he or she will love whatever you had did
When you love someone
You will slowly change yourself
Maybe you will found that you lost yourself
But actually you also get happiness
Actually love is just a very simple thing
Everyone also will have love
Everyone also will love someone
Maybe just love one in your entire life
Or will love dozen of people in your entired life
But you only will found the one you wish to have rest of your life with
Once you found the one
Please grab it tight
If you miss it
You maybe will never found back the one who really can have for your rest of life
Is it miracle
But life is like this
We never challenge our destiny but only can accept it
Since what we going to face already destiny by god once we are born
So please appreciate whatever you have now
Even you have miss the one you really appreciate
Please wait
Please empty your heart
Because one day he or she will found you actually are the best
Once you have back please appreciate well
Since god already give you 2 chance
If you still miss the chance given by god
Nobody else will sympathy you anymore
Human must learn to fall down before learn to walk
Human must learn to lose before know to love
Sound stupid right
But we are human
So we are not perfect
So we must tolerate with each other
As long as the person really love you
Then will never lie you
If the person really care you
Then will always cheer you up after you are hurt and sad
So we must learn to forget and forgive
It is very important
Because nobody is perfect
If you really love he or she
You will only found out how good is he or she
But not keep look for his or her weakness
If you really do so
Believe me..this love will never last long
Each couple also will quarrel
Each couple also got weakness
So please keep give excuse to look for better one
While the one with you now already quiet good
Because you will never found who is 100% perfect
And maybe you will get hurt and hurt again along the road
But it is good too
Since you will only be matured and grow up afterward
This the route to learn
Even myself also the same
What i have learn maybe is not enough for me to love and care someone
But i will keep continue to learn
Only i can be a better guy

Dream again...

Dream about you again...
But this time i actually also don't know what im dream at all
What i know is i saw you beside me
Stand there doing nothing
Saying nothing
I also don't know what it actually mean
I try to talk with you but you have no respond also
Is a weird dream
But it is not 1st time i dream about you
I think most of night also i will dream you
I don't know do you will still dream about me
Or already start to dream others?
What i hope is my pillow and Ahzai still can make you sleep good
Do they still have my smell??
I think you should wash the pillow already
Is quiet dirty now....

Reason...

I now feel imcomplete...
One person is complete when succeed in their life...their study...their love
How ever im a big loser in all these things
Why...?
Wish to know why?
Erhm...
How should i start this blog...
Let me think and organised 1st...
I don't know why today im so blur...
Can't even think anything at all....
Oh my god...
Well...
How ever also i must write some about my feeling right now....
If not i will never recover myself
My life is so miserable now...
I don't know why what ever i do also wrong...
Do i really so bad..
Do i really that terrible
Why i can't even do 1 thing that will supported by people
Why i can't even do 1 thing will praise by anyone...
Im so confuse about characteristic sometime
How do other people think about me
After think long time also i will never get any answer for it
Weird...
But for my view im a bad bad guy
Not from personality or thinking
But is from emotional and temper and also my attitude
Even the bad thing i do won't cost me to jail
But it always hurt people around me
I know there is a lot people don't like me
Or should say hate me
Since i been keep tease by people around me
But i will just pay back them a smile
Sound like nothing will happen
But it will always in my mind and heart
And this drive myself more lose control
I don't mind to get hurt but please don't keep do so to me every single minute
Im also human being
I just a normal person who also have my own feeling
Im nothing
Maybe you all fool me like trash
But im not
Im just an ordianry guy
Who need friends
Who need love
Who need care
Please don't do like this anymore
Im scared i can't control myself anymore
Since i have this kind of life since im 6 years old
I have enough of this kind of life
There is nobody will really care for my feeling
Nobody but will keep blame me and blame me
I will be good if you are treat me well
Since my hurt in my heart and mind never have single chance to recover
Somemore you all are not vincy
If is vincy who keep hurt me then i will admit all
How bad the hurt i have also i will forget and forgive
I will never blame or angry her
Because she is the one who i really love
Whatever she can do to me doesn't mean you all can do too
So please stop fooling me around anymore
I just wish to have my simple life
For my study
Is really preassure and tension to be study Degree in Beijing
Since their stand is higher than us
And also because i don't pay much attention to my study before
And because im not a clever guy
I must work very hard to achieve my goal
But is really hard for me...
Mandarin is one of my challenge since it is so hard to understand sometime
And the homework and assignment i have really a lot
Just for last semester
You all know why i had change lot for my last semester?
Because my days full with class until i have no extra time to relax or exercise at all
My life for last semester is really pack
Make me almost can't breath at all
Few technical drawing i need to rush every week
Must draw accurate
Is so hard somemore had to keep think the way to change and draw
Because im not so good in 3D imagination
Each day after i have time with vincy then i have to start to think and rush
I have never sleep more than 3 hour each day for continuous 5month
Somemore i have 4 report to write each week
I had to settle all report before attend the experiment
After experiment i need to do the conclusion and calculation
And write a whole new report again before we can submit
And i have class for 6 days a week
Saturday is the most relax class but need use a lot of energy and strength
We go for grinding,moulding and other lots more
Sorry because i don't know other in english
The book i need to digest for last semester is more than 10
Somemore 1 have 2 mathematic subject last semester
Mathematic is the subject i worst in
And keep ask me to prove
Damn...
Then i have 3 physic paper and 1 chemistry paper to settle in whole semester
Total subject i have is 7
But each subject also got sub-subject comes out
Either is practical or experiment
The life i have last semester really terrible
All the preassure and tension make me more and more crazy
Somemore i always being alone here without your news make me more worry
Sorry because of all i had treat you so bad
Sorry
I treat you good in 1st sememster compared to last semester is all because study mess me up
But is still my wrong because i never learn to reduce my preassure and tension
And keep let them to drive my emotional and temper
I know at usual i already have some temper and emotional
But i still manage to control
But once i lost control i totally don't know what im doing at all
What i know is i need more and care and love from you
I know im so selfish for this
I know....
So i will change myself
This semester also quiet busy
But i will never repeat the same mistake anymore
I will learn from the mistake i make last semester
You maybe no more care for what i say...
But i will still make it
You maybe will never feel my changes
But i will still make it
For my love
Sure is because i lost vincy from my life...
Reason no need i repeat anymore
Im sure you know already...

I will be forever yours
Nobody can ever try to take me from you
This is my promise to you since i know you
And i will never break this promise
Since i believe one days you will feel my changes and good
And will accept me back
Just i don't know when is the day
Maybe 1 month...
Maybe 1 year...
Maybe 10 years...
Nobody will know
But i know my heart will never change
Forever just belong to vincy
Only vincy deserved to have my heart
No others...
I will wait the miracle day comes
I love and miss you here
Even we don't contact each other
Doesn't mean i forget you
Because you have my word
Because you had my heart
Because you had me...

To Cecilia

I know you treat me really good
I know you love me
But all this really need time
Since for me i just love vincy
I really want her back
So i don't want to have any other relationship before she back
For me now just wish to show her my loyarity and my changes
No other thing
I know you had wait me since august 2008
But that time i already have vincy with me
But i can feel you got some feel on me
Just you never say and i never ask
Since we keep all in heart better
Because after speak out will make both shy when face each other
Somemore i never think i will left vincy at all since i really love and love her
I never been so deep in love before
Vincy is the 1st and the last girl who make me feel want to marry with
I had told my mother not to marry before
But is you who change my mind
I don't like shopping also becasue vincy make me change my mind and enjoy to shopping with her
You know i really love her
Nomatter how long you want to wait also i don't think i will accept you one
Even you say you don't mind to be replacement while she not with me
But i don't wish to be like this
Is unfair to both of you
Even you say you don't mind to have vincy back
But i can't do like this
Because i know vincy don't like her boyfriend betray her
So i will never ever do like this to her
Since i don't want to hurt her anymore
I now already so regret for everything
If i still do like this
Im sure she will never forgive me
Sorry cecilia
Please don't wait anymore
Please don't waste anymore time on me
You can get other better guy than me
If you still keep continue to wait
Then i have nothing to say
Just let god decide our destiny
You take care there
Don't always sleep so late
Not good....

Temporarily forget but not forever

Im now so tired for everything
So i think i should temporarily forget you
But i will kept my love to you in my heart
And will still wait for you
For this moment i just try to change myself more
And also calm myself down 1st
I will wait until the chance come
Then i will back to you again
I want to win your heart back again
Since you now choose to be with him
I also can't do or say anything else
So i had to bless for you
Nomatter how also must take good care of yourself
No F
Watch out of yourself
Anything also im ready for you
I will help you whenever you need me
I never reject to do anything for you
Because you are you
You are vincy
You are my beloved one for my entire life
I will wait for you here...
I sure will win you back one day
Don't worry
As i promise
I will become your dream prince forever
I will never lose the chance anymore....
Miss you....

Erhm....

Erhm...
I really don't know what i can eat now...
What i have just bread,mee,apple
Since i don't go to canteen for my meal
Because there is nothing suitable me now...
All contain meat while im now can't take in any meat
Haiz...
I don't wish to break my promise again
Since i had break a lot of promise in my whole life
From now on i must strict to whatever promise i had make
Nomatter how serious is the promise
Nomatter to who i promise
Also i must take my promise
I will never ever break again
Since i had break a lot of promise when with you
All the promise i make only i can last for few days except for some
Im so regret why i can't stick to my promise to change myself in early time
If i can make it also we will never come to this...
Haiz...
What to do...
Sigh so much also can't help anything more
What is more useful is i change myself permanent
Whatever you don't like also i must change
Whatever you never mention but is bad also i must change