Why im still waiting for something impossible?

Why im still waiting for something impossible?
I really don't know why im so stupid
Keep waiting here while you now already no longer love me
I know i already don't have much chance to ask you back to my side anymore
Since you already make up your mind to accept if he ask
Do i need to say goodbye to you now?
But i still very love you
But i still very care you
But i still very worry you
I really can't put you down from my life
I really can't put you down from my heart
But i really don't know how to face you once you be with him
Im so jealous
Im so envy
Because you are so perfect for me
Because you are so good for me
If i really say goodbye to you
Im sure i will regret awhile later
You know i really love you
Even we breakup before because of me
But im so regret and ask for your back
I know im bad
I know i had hurt you very deep
But at that moment i really wish to say goodbye to you
Because i feel that you are so suffer and tired to be with me while i sometime really don't treat you good
Im so regret why must i hurt you so before
Now i finally know how your feel when your love one ask to breakup
I now still feel so hurt and sad
I feel thousand of knife stab into my heart
Sorry...